Friday, October 29, 2010

这个秋夜

半夜醒来,怎么也睡不着,只好打开灯,看看到底几点钟,有没有可能在天亮之前睡回去。

四点一刻。

我知道有些自杀的人选择在这个时刻,他们的思想陷入一种常人不能走入的歧角。难怪在这个时刻醒来,我总是觉得消极。

我要去见一个人,之前充满了憧憬,每天晚上在衣间里试穿衣服,将那些平日不穿的高跟鞋摆出来,一双一双的踩上去,站在镜子前面。

只是现在这一刻忽然犹豫起来了。

晚上走出门去拿信件,看到满天的繁星,风是清爽的。就要降温了,这可能是今年最后一个可以穿着单衣出来散步的夜晚。满地黄的红的树叶,如果不是孩子们在家里面,我很想踏着树叶走到外面去,走远一些。

秋景让人伤感。事实上所有良辰美景都让我伤感。只有恶劣的天气躲在屋内,我才觉得那个时刻是温馨的,因为这个时间你不得不躲在屋子里,不用为那些美景没有人和自己分享而遗憾。

2 comments:

John said...

Oh that made me feel really sad, but for a different reason from yours. Your words made me recall when I and my wife went to the Grand Canyon a few years ago, I felt that we had a great time together, until recently when I and my wife quarreled, she said that during that time she wasn't happy because she didn't feel I was the right person to share those moments with her.

shine's blog said...

well, it is sad that even me, an outsider, can feel your wife doesnot love you:)
But that is ok, isn't it?